September 21, 2008

Today on PostSecret

OK, I admit it, I am a huge PostSecret junkie.

So, here's what resonated with me this morning:

Gee, that's awfully considerate of you, but I don't think you realize that I (and presumably other atheists) take this about the same way as you would if I said that I prayed for your protection through Zeus. You disbelieve in many gods; I just disbelieve in one more. Personally, I can't believe this one was chosen to be put up online- that's just what every religious person says when you say you don't believe in a higher power: "I'll pray for you."

The friends we create in our minds are often so much more understanding and seem more real than our living ones.

At this point, whoever's reading this is probably wondering where the secret that you'd most expect to find here is. So, with no further ado...
I did not send this secret in, but I could have awhile back. Summarized in a few words, this was me September 2oo6- March 2oo7. Making the effort to die would be too much. Whether I lived or died it didn't matter to me. The depression of this period is very difficult for me to write about- which is why I probably haven't mentioned it much. I drifted through life and decent judgement was... nonexistent. I didn't care if I broke every bone in my body; I didn't care if I was arrested.

And that was what I've come to believe screwed me up even more deeply.


  1. Wow. That last image is exactly how I feel a lot of the time. I found your blog the other day and have read the whole thing. I know I probably can't say much, but you know...

  2. The last one struck a chord with me too. When you've hit rock bottom no-one else can help you til you've pulled yourself up but once you're out of immediate danger they disappear.

  3. @Sammisal-
    Thanks for passing by. I was rather wondering who it was that clicked on every single page of the blog two days ago.

    In the end, the only person anyone is living for is themself. And once that someone has decided to keep on living, she suddenly asks herself why the hell she did that.